Ten thousand Words on one Hundred Grand

Part of the opening is Laurie and Doug giving decorating advice to a https://spankingporn.vip/ while-shifted Pilgrims. Fortunately, the Pilgrims are only actors, as a result of actual Pilgrims would most likely have the decorating duo within the pillory with their ears nailed to the wood. Laurie's violating costume codes (circa 1620) and Doug is, let's be trustworthy right here, Doug. If they did not find one thing to hate after one or two episodes they would not be making an attempt laborious enough. That is adopted by a shot of Amy Wynn and another Pilgrim sawing a log with a two-particular person saw while Ty tries to look busy. Ty suggests a cordless saw. Well, that's form of what it's already. The trenches: The room Doug can be abusing is a kitchen/dining-room/residing-room combo. Which is, to my eyes, gaudy and cramped. And these things is new? Cripes. Homeowners: Tina and James. Laurie's sufferer room is a long but not terrible-looking living room. Its foremost downside is that it looks, well, really really lived-in. But I'm being polite. I do not prefer it much, either. Homeowners: John and Barbie. (A blonde named Barbie. They're all blondes, aren't they?) They even have canine, so Barbie does not need anything "too fancy", as a result of she has animals. You bought Laurie in there, you already know that? I'd drive this automobile right into a wall if it weren't for the opposite individuals on the highway! Ah, Laurie and Doug go shopping. Laurie, being the great particular person she is, is backseat driving, saying she is aware of how you can get to Beacon Hill. She follows this up by proclaiming to the primary set of ears she sees (an antiques seller) that Doug's driving will not be as much as par. She additionally will get the vapours (no less than, that's what it looked like) when telling the seller that she's answerable for half a hundred grand in cash. Antique seller immediately tries to sell her every part in arm's attain. He knows his clients, that's for sure. You've watched this present before... right? Ah, one of the homeowners has already talked about that she desires to maintain her beloved floor. And already I hear each carpenters speaking about their Designing Overlords changing the flooring. It's already shaping up to be a regular day at the races. Decadent: In the means of moral or physical decay. Laurie buys a $2,800 chair and squeals that she's "sooooooooo decadent!" She additionally mentions that she has carte blanche, "No one to carry me accountable!" for what she does. (Calls up a screencap of the homeowners.) Yep, it is just a regular day at the races, all proper. Ads with out the commercials: Only Ty, Amy Wynn, and a camera crew may walk into a home Depot and get assist instantly. Ty, ever the gentleman, asks to be helped find the bathroom. Ty-dor the Burninator: Ty (who, driving a toy car in one other scene, spun out) supposedly blocked the fireplace lane of the home Depot he went to. Math time: if the wood he is taking a look at (and wincing about the worth) is $529 per sq. foot, and there's about a hundred square feet in the shop, how a lot will the lawsuit for simply that lumber be if the place burns down? Ad executives. They execute advertisements. Throughout the commercial, we see Sony Vega advert primary. Remember that. The Perkinator: Paige explains the foundations, and looks to be about to burst before she mentions the $100,000. When she does point out it, there's much excitement and Barbie accuses Paige of being "filled with it". If you mean full of perkiness, you're right. Meanwhile, Tina's vocabulary has devolved into "Stop it! Stop it!" I died in your arms tonight: Laurie, ever the grasp of the refined, tells the newly-arrived homeowners that she is "Dying, I'm dying for you!" Evidently Tina would not need Laurie useless - in opposition to the needs of a few audience members, one would assume - as a result of she continues her litany of "Stop it!" in between other, more meaningful, phrases. Laurie also claims she's shaking, and she holds out her hand and shakes it to prove it. (Holds out hand and shakes it.) Damn, so am I. Hard to sort with one hand, although. Gender mirrors: Both male homeowners appeared reluctant to hitch their wives in the big Excited Designer Hug. Don't they make sauce? Product placement alert: Doug's putting in Pergo floors. Crooooooooooooooowbar! Tina and James attempt to pry their neighbor's Tv out of an armoire, however it is wedged in tight. Much endeavoring lastly frees it of its moorings. My evil side needed to see them use a crowbar, but they didn't, I assume because it's, you understand, a bigass expensive Tv. Damn, the destruction quotient will probably be surprisingly low this episode. Meanwhile, Doug unloaded some new cabinets. Woo! They'll destroy the previous cabinets! No one can use old cabinets! Woo! Grrr! Hulk indignant! Hulk run fingers although hair and sigh and say Hulk is confused! Laurie will, she claims, have a serious hissy match if the carpet is glued. It isn't, so we're saved a music and dance, and as a substitute subjected to a music and dance about putting down maple floors. She's shaking her palms once more too, however with each hands. (Tries it.) TYPUNG WITGH Nose HARDF.L. Prrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrybar! Mark, Nathan, and John. No, they don't seem to be apostles, they're Doug's team of pleasant Home Depot Product Placement At-Home Services helpers. Wow, between the extendible pointer stick he's been using to level at things, the identify "Operation Sophistication", and his army of builders, he's going to be wearing a basic's outfit for the designer chat at the end of the episode. They've also acquired a pry bar! MANLY DESTRUCTION TIME! Airhead vs. Gasbox: Laurie (to her huge and abyssal disappointment) cannot change the gasbox fireplace, as it would take too lengthy. Given the shoddy-work horror stories you hear from some former Trading Spaces victims homeowners, I ponder at changing it anyway. I can see the headlines now: "Plymouth obliterated in fireball. Homeland Security looking Al-Qaeda agent codenamed 'Laurie Smith'." Drawer Wars: Okay, first the 'Amy Wynn and Ty battle for the router bit instrument drawer' gags were humorous, however they quickly obtained severely creepy. I do not even wish to know what the hell's happening with those boxer-quick-like abominations Ty whipped out - Is that a factor to make it look like your ass is hanging out? - but I'd like to have phrases with someone over it. Painful phrases. Though I wonder at Amy Wynn's qualifier that that is the primary time she and Ty have crossed paths "as carpenters". I'm secretly hoping it means that the subsequent Trading Spaces spinoff will likely be Trading Spaces: Highlander. You know, Amy Wynn's strolling down a dark alley, then there's that bizarre sound as Ty steps out of the shadows, they have a flashback to this scene, then they pull out swords and try to hack one another's heads off. (If it ever happens, my prayers are with Amy Wynn. Oh, wait, I'm agnostic. Okay, my vitriolic words of hatred are with Ty, then.) Heeeeeeere we're, born to be kings.... Well, I assume this Amy Wynn vs. Ty arm wrestling is as close as I'll get to an epic battle at the top of which there may be just one. Paige breaking it up is hardly epic, as properly. Spank me, I've been a foul dangerous boy.... Paige took to slapping guys on the ass this episode. First was Ty (although she missed and acquired him closer to the kidney) when he made a final play for Amy Wynn's instrument drawer. It will need to have been spontaneous, else I'm certain Ty's scriptwriter (he must have one, no mannequin-turned-carpenter could suppose up this much dialogue) would have put in some low-cost-shot remark about having fun with the spanking. Her second victim was a homeowner, John (who's working with Doug), however she seemed to imply it as encouragement as he walks off camera to do some work. He appeared to take it as encouragement, as I heard an off-digital camera "Woo-hoo!" only a few seconds after the slap. I presume the delay was John rapidly checking to verify that Paige, not Doug, had slapped him. I'm so disappointed I need to bust up one thing! They didn't bust up the cabinets. Paige is as dissatisfied as I'm. Seems that John, not content with getting his dwelling performed as he works here, is taking the cabinets for his garage. Aww, boo. Recyclers be DAMNED! On tonight's Trading Spaces, Ty helps Laurie get in contact together with her inner pimp: At least, that is what it appears to be like like as he gives her his pimp-flavah massive "$$$" ring and matching greenback-sign neck weight during their discussion of the new mantle for the fireplace. "Yeah, just cover your marriage ceremony ring with that." Evidently he isn't trying to make her appear to be a single madam as a lot as externalizing her desire to spend and spend and spend. Well, he is on the right track then. I simply did not notice that Laurie's inner desires appeared so very similar to a homey wit' bling-bling. There's bought to be therapy for that. Evidently, the bling-bribe was sufficient to clean Laurie's mind of excellent concepts: Ty gets to design the entertainment heart. It cantilevers. Sounds attention-grabbing. Though, if a brand new viewer tuned in whereas he was describing it intimately and how it will tie into the room, they'd be wondering why the designer's carrying a software belt and who the girl within the gaudy jewellery is. Oh captain my captain: Doug's acquired a struggle room set up. I tell ya, he's going to be Four-Star General Doug before that is over. Oh my God, he's bought a wall-sized chart. And Paige is looking it sensible. For Hastur's sake, do not encourage him! He's also summoned Mark, an electrician, from the misty deep. His army is expanding with every passing minute; before lengthy no mortal will have the ability to cease his reign. The electrician goes to put in lights (recessed fixtures) around the fireplace. Wait a minute, that's Mark the electrician, John the homeowner, and Mark, Nathan, and John the unrelated three-man Home Depot collective. Man, this is going to get complicated. No, it's not yellow. It's a dark light off-off-yellow. Laurie first appears to be admitting to the truth that her paint palette is, nicely, limited. "You recognize, I attempt to idiot everybody, and it is like... naaaah." Yellow. It may be yellow. "I do not see this shade as boring. It's a ravishing wealthy colour and I'm using the flawed software to attempt get the can prime off with...." No, you're utilizing the proper software flawed. I can see the lid transferring nearly an inch off the can on the far facet. Because the paint stirrer she's utilizing is just going to get covered in paint anyway, she ought to just stick it in the can at the boundary between the open part of the lid and the stuck half, and twist. As she reveals the paint - which is yellow - she fires the primary salvo in her regular battle over the exact color. "I understand it appears extra yellow there" - That's because it is yellow! - "however it dries a extremely type of earthen...." An earthen yellow possibly? James appears to have seen the present before, as he mumbles one thing that seems like "It dries...." like he's going to say "It dries yellow." however trails off. Laurie, undaunted by my muttered insults and James's nebulous comments, continues. "It's known as 'Chestertown Buff'." Appears like a porn star. Our Yellow Du Jour has 37 results in Google, it's so widespread. Laurie paints some on the blue wall, so we are able to all see the glory of not-yellow that she's seeing. On the wall, it seems to be yellow. So yellow, in truth, that even she's pressured to admit it. "And on this blue, it's looking actually yellow." No, my expensive, it isn't the blue that is making it yellow, it's the yellow that's making it yellow. Tina tries to be consoling and compromising. I don't suppose she's seen a lot of this present earlier than, then. She says "I believe Barbie wished yellow. I imply, we can say yellow, okay? We will say buff, however it's yellow." But Laurie's not performed but, no sir. After closing her eyes (to avoid the damning yellow proof, I presume) and tensing up like she's simply stepped into one thing disgusting, she says "No, but it's not yellow! Eeeee!* Let me go get the swatch; this is gonna drive me loopy, it's not y'all." (*To translate that "Eeee!" into written English: That's "Eeee!" as in "Eeee! This is unpleasant!" not "Eeee! A MOUSE!" or "Eeee! We're finished!" A bad, but not scary, eeee.) Tina, getting sick of Laurie's avoidance of the painting (and the writing) on the wall, factors at the yellow and says "Laurie, yellow." as if she was introducing them to each other. I'm pondering they're going to want to add a tenth circle to Hell just to accommodate the bad Trading Spaces designers. Another one! Doug has hired an "artisan" named Ron. Doug explains how he hires art groups to do creative work for all his excessive end shoppers. I'm positive that may put Barbie at ease, once she goes dwelling and learns that Laurie hasn't employed anyone to this point and is burning time arguing about yellow. Speaking of which.... And another one of these too.... For each hired hand Doug summons, Laurie has an insistence that it's not frickin' yellow. (Not that she'd ever use such words herself, no....) Paige has appeared to echo Laurie's sentiment that it that it wants two coats. However, Paige says they need it simply to ensure it's actually, surprise shock, yellow. I wonder at the positive precision with which Laurie reaches the top of the sentence "It's Chestertown Buff, it is not..." simply as Paige chimes in with "And it seems..." so Paige and the homeowners' shout of "Yellow!" concurrently drowns out Laurie and ends her sentence. Laurie, in response, throws a miniature foot-stamping tantrum. "No it is not, it's BUFF!" She follows this with a giggle, which reminds me of a Usenet troll who follows a flame with a smiley face, so you can by no means fairly tell if he's insulting or simply tactless. I do hope her one-year-outdated son Gibson is watching, he'll study some great tips for being a brat just by watching Mommy! Then we'll see a toddler robust sufficient to hoist his mother with her own petard. Ahhh! Prison of love flashback! No, it isn't quite brown-gray enough, however Ron explains they're going to be putting a blue-gray plasterish/paintish product on the partitions, which can then be speckled with the same stuff to make a textured wall. Doug does the primary coat (using a roller), then Barbie does the speckling (using a brush). The speckling seems to be nice. Paige fault: Laurie seems to have conveniently forgotten that $a thousand of her funds (she thankfully has $1500 left, I used to be so nervous) is going to Paige, to take a homeowner purchasing for the "Paige Gift", an merchandise of the homeowner's choice that the designer could have to use within the room. My suggestion to Tina and James: $One thousand of vivid green paint, or one of the other colors Laurie cannot use as a primary level of her designs. Oh, and a can of inventory-normal yellow, just for comparison functions. Laurie, feeling the money slipping out of her fingers, bites her finger in considered how to spend her final $500 earlier than Paige grabs it. Apparently, Paige already has some ideas about where to take the homeowners shopping. She says it's to Laurie's liking. Laurie ain't buying it. Where's the pink-hot eye poker? Or the cyanide? The going-to-commercial bumper was a shot of Ty smothering Amy Wynn with the creepy boxer shorts. Within the immortal words of A.K. Swift: "Watch me vomit!" Speaking of vomiting.... Sony Vega advert number two. Keep in mind that. Oh, and does not the ditty within the background of the "E-Bay bidding" Earthlink advert sound like the Moon Patrol theme? The Howling: Tina and James talk about how lucky their neighbors are to be scoring all-new furnishings. (And your old cabinets, sister.) Tina, however, mentions that they've a giant ol' "Marmaduke" dog (That's the kind of animals they've?) that was allowed on the outdated furnishings. Oh, I'm certain that $2,800 chair goes to have high resale value when, instead of something like Laurie's dainty little hips, it should have a giant mass of slobbering dogflesh parked on it. And do not forget no matter fabric Laurie's bought in thoughts for this room.... James needs to sink their $one thousand present into a great gate. Meanwhile, Paige springs her Paige Gift on John and Barbie. I discover she doesn't stress the "Has to use it within the room." thing. Or certainly, even have Doug round. Ty vs. Ty: A shot of Amy Wynn. Something sails in from off-digital camera and hits her, eliciting an "Ow! That one damage!". I used to be sure it was Ty, however instead it is Doug proving he could be a bastard, too. Doug is getting Amy Wynn to make a table. The desk of her dreams. Dougie boy, the table of her dreams is prefab. Though she does caress that wood actually lovingly. Hordes of men watching need to be that wooden. The desk will be six by three in mahogany and maple. Amy Wynn promises to have the constructing of it accomplished tonight, so it may be finished up tomorrow - evidently the crew would not have the planer wanted to deal with the job. Doug's military of teamsters vs. Laurie's seamster: Finally, Laurie's first sign of hired help, Daniel, appears. Or, more precisely, Laurie drags Tina into the dank basement-cum-sweatshop the place she's trapped the poor man. He's a "professional 'stitcher', is what the right lingo is for a man". So, what's it for a woman? A stitchress? A stitchrix? A stitchrice? Or may it presumably be a 'stitcher' as well? It all sounded like she was stressing that he was a man. He's a man, we could tell, he looks like one, he can sew, large deal, let's move on. Tina has been taken into the dungeons so she can iron. Appliances are better than entertainment: Doug speaks to the homeowners about their Paige gift. They're leaning extra in the direction of home entertainment, surround sound, etc. Doug is steering them towards kitchen appliances. Did the man not funds for them, or what...? Dougby and Pokey: Doug continues to be tapping and poking at things with his little pointer, from Amy Wynn's wooden to the cabinets. He's additionally demanding to be saluted by his Home Depot expenses, now. One in every of the house Depot folks, who I'm calling MarkNathanorJohn, mentions (at Doug's repeated proddings for a sensible ETA on getting the cabinets carried out) that it's going to be just a few hours "so long as we haven't any extra interruptions". Doug asks MarkNathanorJohn if he is implying that Doug is an interruption. MarkNathanorJohn denies it, however homeowner John turns quisling and says that MarkNathanorJohn is certainly implying that. Looks like John's jockeying for the position of Trusted Lieutenant. So Laurie carries a headshot of Doug together with her wherever she goes? Well, a minimum of it's not a headshot of Frank.... Laurie is hiding her face behind a monochrome headshot of Doug (very attractive image, I have to admit, in that noncommittal man way of admitting one other guy looks hunky). She's doing this as part of a complex and totally nonscripted subterfuge specializing in stealing Doug's electrician away to do her electrics work. The gag, while drained, isn't as dangerous as it sounds as a result of this is all shot through the Paige Cam. Laurie, who normally appears not less than kind of cute, tends to appear to be a fish on the Paige Cam. For many of this Paige Cam moment, we won't see her face. Think of all of the unborn nuts that died for this mantle! Ty has busted out a new walnut wood mantle for Laurie (from a photograph of the same mantle). Laurie says that, despite the haste, it is essentially the most beautiful thing she's ever seen. Well, use good wood instead of MDF, that occurs. Also, working with the Banyan brand looming over him probably reminds him of his evil company masters. You do not displease the evil corporate masters, for they are refined and fast to downsize. I, for one, welcome my evil company masters! It is the rattling general they appointed I've problems with: Amy Wynn speaks to the Paige Cam for a moment on how, despite solely working on one house, it appears like 4 due to all that's going on. She additionally fondles the wood once more. Mahogany. I'd fondle it too. Doug seems to have unusual ideas. Doug wants to stain the mahogany black. I do know nothing about wood, however Amy Wynn (getting pressured over the whole affair) seems like she's heading in the right direction when she explains the next: Doug needs the wooden darkish, but would not appear to be considering that ending it's going to darken it to begin with. Staining it in addition is just going to make it seem like they painted it black. The wooden grain might be lost within the blackness. Doug's ears do not seem to be burning pink throughout this: He's together with his electrician as the fellow installs the last of the halogen ceiling lights. Doug performs with the dimmer a bit. Maybe he can sense the approach of immortals: Ty, sensing James's method, turns and greets him without any apparent cues that James should be there. For his subsequent trick, he will get James to saw a bit of wooden. Ty then goes on to indicate Laurie his sketchbook web page devoted to the cocktail table he is doing. I'm glad that the digicam angle permits us to see inside the sketchbook and confirm it's a picture of a desk: Laurie gasps with such depth on the sketch that, if we could not see it, we might marvel what else Ty's been sketching. Appliances are higher than entertainment redux: So this is the reason Doug would not need his individuals spending their $1,000 Paige Gift money on leisure. There is a Sony Vega 42 inch plasma Tv sitting in a trailer exterior. Surround sound, computer that is built-in with the entire mess if Doug is to be believed, the whole shebang. How good's the safety on these shoots, and any idea if they're doing another $100,000 episode? John's thought on the bins of expensive expertise? "Good thing this is going to James, 'trigger I would not have the ability to figure it out." (Blink. Blink.) Come ON! You're a guy! Tv-related toys and the obtaining thereof are some extent of honor for most men! Try to be on your knees praying for certainly one of these things! You sissy! After all, I would not want one either, I'd moderately a bigass monitor for my 3.06 GHz Pentium field, however I admit my sissiness. And my geekiness. This promo of types was, all in all, a convenient approach to do an in-present Sony Vega plug to match those we've seen twice so far within the advert blocks. In unrelated information, apparently John "received the coin toss" (which was also off-digital camera... hmm) and is going out with Paige to hunt down the elusive Paige Gift. Barbie is upset that she has to stay dwelling while her husband will get to go out with Paige. Good factor she missed the ass-slapping and the "Woo-hoo!" a while again, else she'd be extra than simply dissatisfied. I also notice that John shouldn't be so fearful about his spouse staying residence with Doug and all these burly Home Depot building staff. Oh ye of much religion. Add an ad rant: I do not like screaming babies in ads. But this Stainmaster Carpet one really will get me: Daddy puts his incessantly screaming child on the carpeted ground whereas he grabs a stuffed animal. Baby falls asleep instantly. As they plug the comfort of the carpet, a disclaimer fades in at the bottom of the screen: "It is strongly recommended infants not sleep on their stomachs." As someone watching with me said: "It is recommended infants not sleep on their stomachs, but this one is not ours so we don't give a damn." Zoooom! The present roars back with a shot of Ty driving a souped-up golf cart, shouting to female pedestrians*, and passing a van reading "The (Something) of Mark Connolly". (*The sound has been muted for the musical again-from-commercial sting, so I don't know what he says.) Kid in a candy store time: Laurie's so completely satisfied about one thing that she has each James and a digital camera crew in tow as she approaches it. It is a truck. In the truck is furnishings. And on the furnishings is... fabric! Laurie expresses her love for the fabric, and begins caressing the primary piece seen by the shipping plastic. She continues by giving a plug to the furnishings maker and explaining how she selected the fabric for the furniture. (After all she would not accept stock upholstering!) She lovingly details, with acceptable closeups, how the yellow in a single piece ties in to the yellow of one other piece. Question: Why are these two pieces of furnishings coated in pale yellow and yellow/acid green stripes, when the walls are, by Laurie's insistence, not yellow at all? Why are the chairs not Chestertown Buff? Or camel? Or any of certainly one of Laurie's odd paint names? Why? Because she loses herself in the outline of the fabric and does not catch herself using the forbidden word.... YELLOW! The prices she quotes, at James' request? $4900 for the sofa, $4200 for the love seat, $3900ish for a chair, and someplace between $1600 and $2600 (Laurie's lost rely) each for 2 other chairs. Custom fabrics have their value. Doug abuses the peons and appeases his masters: During Laurie's furnishings lovefest, we minimize away for the next bits: 1) Amy Wynn shows her progress on the desk to Doug. They argue about the completion time, ending with Amy Wynn's "Fifteen (minutes) AND You're not STAINING IT!" 2) Doug and his pointing stick meet with MarkNathanorJohn. MarkNathanorJohn explains how they're installing the new cabinets and how he simply, as a result of he's a nice man, knocked together a piece of conduit so a flooring vent that was ineffective beneath the outdated floor cupboards will now redirect out into the kitchen. Doug says how much he loves MarkNathanorJohn's work. The gods of Home Depot smile and nod and see it is nice. They promise to provide Doug another slave to push around. 3) Amy Wynn reveals Barbie the way to do mitered edges with a chop noticed. Get transferring or I'll plant another one in your ass! Paige and her slapping pal John are off to blow $1000. And they're off in a stretch limo. Paige notices that John seems nonchalant in regards to the limo and the $a thousand money Paige is brandishing. After all he is, he's obtained Paige in the backseat with him and he's subsequently robotically kicked into "suave" mode. I imply, Paige within the backseat of a limo with a number of cameras, what more might a guy want? For the rest of this purchasing journey, I'm calling John "Spanky". Ty reveals more of his sketchings to women: Tina's studying concerning the desk that makes Laurie gasp. Tina, in distinction, is gasp-free. Meanwhile, Barbie's not an apt pupil at Amy Wynn's chop noticed. The blade stops halfway by means of a piece of wood and the machine starts screaming like a banshee with its leg in a bear trap. Amy Wynn has Barbie cease and explains what occurs when you place a lot pressure on the handle. Barbie, supposedly wiser for the lesson, then starts up once more and the screeching begins once more. Reacting to the "a lot power" screeching, she puts both fingers on the handle and starts using twice as a lot force as before. Now commences Amy Wynn shouting "TURNITOFFTURNITOFFTURNITOFF!" over the blade's unholy rasp. The blade off, she calmly (I don't know the way) says "You've received my saw slightly offended." Well, the noticed might be angry, but I do not think it's the saw that's probably seeing visions of twisting this Barbie doll's head until it comes off. Ty packs his wood and Tina into a car to go on a quest for heavier hardware services. Guy doing gal issues: Shh, it's a Best Buy. Shhhh! Paige and Spanky arrive at a Best Buy, a fact that is barely apparent when you see the reflected logo and the occasional in-store signal. I'm guessing they didn't pay enough ad dollars. Now, we see Spanky's fantasies about going out with Paige dashed hopelessly in opposition to the rocks of actuality. While she is a woman, and he a man, there's nonetheless something separating them: She's a woman, and he is a man. A girl and a man who're buying. Paige begins to mull over the relative benefits between a toaster and a toaster-oven, while Spanky just wants to grab the first thing that appears like a toaster and go. Paige, being the great hostess, offers in simpler than any self-respecting girl ever ought to. Gal doing guy issues: She's out with Ty. Shhhh! While on their discipline journey to the Magic Land of Big Routers, Ty - referring to himself within the third particular person - corrects Tina's misconceptions of a high-tech router, which he claims will not be so much like a "funky saw" (in Tina's words) as it is like the Terminator. Insert your California recall joke here. However, Ty shortly defers to the Keeper of the Router for more complicated info. On this the Keeper fails, principally regurgitating Ty's words but with extra jargon and less action film references. Guy doing gal things, half 2: It is a bust. And cease looking at Paige's! Paige declares the procuring trip "a bust". Now we all know Best Buy did not pay a lot. But Spanky has an concept! A Playstation for the kids! Imagine taking part in that on the bigscreen Tv! Paige says, "Oh, dude, you are thinking!" What he hasn't thought of is that there is going to be a holy war over that Tv when the parents want to observe cable and the youngsters need to play Crash Bandicoot. Gal doing guy issues, half 2: What-what-WHAT? Ty discusses one thing with Tina over the router noise. It sounds to me like "I feel the goowa bafudgeit! 'Cuz I fava mudgeit! Az az a beautiful factor!" Tina responds with "Take a stroll down to my home next!" I feel Ty's speaking about how you can also make lovely issues with a large budget. Nepotism! Doug has hired an previous coworker (nicely, an old supervisor, I believe - Doug used to work in his shop) named Chris to help Amy Wynn do some wainscoting work. Doug kisses Amy Wynn to accelerate the work. Chris declines a similar boon. That's a lovely wainscoat: So, of two pronunciations of 'wainscoting' I found in all the dictionaries I checked and one I discovered solely in just a few, they went for the rarer one. Okay, nice. I hear "Postal 2" is actually good. Let's get that. Ah, the wonders of selecting a recreation to go with the PS2. After Paige and her pal present their incompetence at playing, Spanky grabs a game and says "This appears like a child's game." An extremely scientific way to do it, in comparison with, say, the rating. Paige says it appears to be like extra like a child's game than, say, (Paige grabs semirandom title) "this". Some rewinding and fastforwarding later and i realized it was Everquest! Bwa-ha-ha! A fantastic plug for the Evercrack Elven Princess and her twin Boobs of Fanboy Attraction +5! Paige, happy about their reasoned selection of game, lets out a scream. Little doubt the opposite clients, who I'm sure are even now being held in the far aspect of the store by TLC safety goons, had been blissful to listen to her whoop of ecstasy. Lil' Miss Eloi visits her pet Morlock: Laurie gasps, either because her basement stitcher has completed the gold desk skirts he was doing, or because the Paige whoop in the last scene deafened her. "Oh, it is so great!" Definitely the skirt, then. Seeing one finished, with yellow-gold topper fabric, elicits an additional half-moaned "Oh, that is lovely." I stated it, there's an orgasmically joyous squeal developing. Are they sporting seatbelts? With 770 dollars left after shopping for the PS2 - It was solely $230 after taxes, with a game? - Paige and Spanky talk about their subsequent cease. Spanky, clearly making an attempt to recall the road from memory, says: "What about Home Depot has a... a... home store!* Home Style... retailer! And it's all high-end appliances... uh, or hello-high-finish** issues for your house." He then adds a hastily-mumbled, "We are able to go there." *Paige quietly begins to prompt him earlier than he catches himself. **He provides the PS2 field he is holding a slap to emphasise his level - or his frustration - right here. Poor Spanky, Paige is making you work to your new cabinets. In all fairness, although, Paige's angst-ridden look, supposedly as she was weighing benefits of the 20 minute one-means trip to the home Depot retailer, followed by a determined "STEP ON IT!" to the limo driver, was only nominally more authentic and far more annoying than Spanky's hack job on the home Depot line. In one other dimension, Doug pushes "Barbie Doll" into some sewing, so she "steps on it" and zips by way of about $5 of the 75-dollar-a-yard silk curtains right away. Doug admonishes her and speaks menacingly of messing up 300 dollars in silk. Now all Barb has to do is tick off Paige and she'll have aggravated the entire holy trinity of Designer, Carpenter, and the Perky Host. Poor girl, tv life isn't treating her properly at all. Though, if Doug's utilizing 75-dollar-a-yard silk for drapes, what's Laurie going to do to trump him? $200 per yard? And another thought: If Doug's so apprehensive concerning the silk, why's he drinking proper over it? Meanwhile, with the competent feminine homeowner.... Ty, now again at the home, takes a break from the cocktail desk of routing wonders to indicate Tina how his master plan on the shelving system goes. After a lot moaning and groaning, he suits the entertainment heart shelving system into place on the long run wall mount. They do not exactly slide as a lot as they can be yanked out of place and caught right into a barely totally different horizontal place. But hey, better to have a snug match than to have all of your CDs fall out of the shelf. He additionally referred to as down the routing magic on the shelving system, to make effective horizontal grooves into which CD jewel instances fit. Tina reiterates her desire to get Ty in her house. Then he says "Are you loopy? There's no room for me over there!" Oh, great. Now Tina knows about the Legions of Doug ravaging the land while she was locked in the basement with a stitcher. I went to the World Expo in Montreal. It was way cooler than this. Paige and Spanky pull up in entrance of the Expo Design Center. I assumed they'd the unsuitable place till I noticed the comparatively tiny writing "A home Depot Company" beneath the title. Between his manly buying technique and his admitted lack of technology talent, he goes for the blender that, as Paige says, just has an on and off switch. My blender's older than I'm and it has extra features than that. We now pause for a break from the Spank & Mindy present. Back dwelling, Barbie is angry (heh heh) that Paige and Spanky are off having enjoyable. Doug turns the screws a bit about the money, the limo, Paige.... Hey, I'd moderately him off in a limo with Paige and a thousand dollars than him off alone in a limo with a thousand dollars. Paige will not be a lady now, she's a girl who's shopping. Whole 'nother being right there. She's about as sexy as a lifeless fish to a median guy right now. Doug turns the screws a bit extra, invoking the work "perky". Because you understand that every screaming tryst is described as "perky". Spanky is doing all of the homework tonight. Bad, dangerous Spanky. We now finish our pause. Paige, displaying her perkiness, attempts to purchase a lot of the store before realizing her price range will not hold. She screams a bit too. I hope Barb did not hear that. After the commercial, and with darkness lurking exterior the windows, they arrive house. Doug struggles with the video recreation title "Jak and Daxter", renaming it "Jak and Dax. Ter." Barb hopes they've greater than that. Paige: "After all Now we have Greater than THAT!" I was hoping she'd say they blew all of it on champagne, a sizzling tub, and some strippers. But it is a household present. Not that Paige dresses all that a lot heavier than the Everquest babe. (Though Paige has never been chained to an altar, much to the dismay of a few of the fanbase.) Doug seems to be anticipating greater than six(ish) packing containers. When there is not, he falls again into diplomat mode and says "Well, that's lots! Cool-cool-cool-cool." Paige is $sixty eight below price range, by the best way. It's sunny again! Ty drives out to see Amy Wynn. He uses, of course, his super golf cart. He virtually goes into the identical spin he did with a toy automobile at the top of the episode. Amy Wynn has sufficient faith not to dive for cover, the idiot. The 2 carpenters commiserate about their workloads and exalt at the actual Wood they're using. Amy Wynn explains Doug's need to abuse the mahogany with ebony stain. Ty, being Ty, says "Ebony and mahogany? Ain't that a tune?" Sadly, Amy Wynn doesn't belt-sand his face off. It's darkish again? Paige proclaims the fading daylight, which has started to fade after its temporary stint of being darkish, then light again. The second-shift Home Depot persons are putting Doug's floor in. He berates Spanky - sorry, "John" - for being out all day with Paige. Laurie exhibits off her maple floors. Cinnamon-colored maple floors. Brown, who'da thunk it? Though it does look nice. Homework: General Doug's two conscripted grunts will likely be painting the ceiling whereas the house Depot hirelings do the ground. That strikes me as a dance and a half, unless everybody learns the right way to wall-walk. Laurie desires her individuals to put in the floor. Oh, wait, she's just kidding! A four-individual Home Depot crew are doing the flooring. In actuality, the homeowners have to polyurethane the wall-shelf thingy and paint the molding for the room. Paige confronts Doug on the wooden staining. He refuses to debate it, for he is the final. Except he can't inform the distinction between residence and Home Depot anymore. Paige says they're each delirious. The legions are most likely considering relieving him of command. Doug obviously hasn't found the trick of mainlining some caffeine crystals. If it doesn't kill you, you may keep up for weeks! Oh, and father mutant children. Paige also makes use of the tremendous golf cart to drive Laurie house, or to whatever momentary domicile is serving the function thereof. When Laurie lists the day's achievements, Paige responds with "No! Get out!" and stops the cart. Laurie finishes speaking and will get out of the cart. Wow, I did not assume Paige really meant that figure of speech actually. Abandoning Laurie in the midst of nowhere with nothing however a digicam crew, floodlights, and no matter transportation the camera crew's utilizing? How will she ever get house? What a heartless bitch. No-drip paint roller: Barbie and John talk about the painted ceiling. They've faith in Doug, although they assume it is bizarre to paint a ceiling. Woah, that is saying one thing. It's saying something else that John's utilizing a clean white roller to paint the ceiling grey. Tiring of this feat, he also helps install the crown molding. The son of Appliances are better than entertainment: Paige, with an umbrella and in numerous clothing from the day's filming, springs the free Tv/audio system/and so forth. thing on James and Tina. Wow, I assume self-confessed tech-illiterate John is getting a fancy-schmancy Tv as nicely. Paige calls Tina "Dude!" but forgets that the Dell Dude and his ilk made that bit of vernacular gender-neutral. She says "I just called you each dudes! I am delirious!" Maybe we should always relieve her of command. I do know this guy named Joe who's obtained internet hosting experience. Paige then springs the computer shock as effectively. Tina responds with "Cut the s---!" and is smart enough to realize that she's going to be getting related surprises. James, after Paige leaves, suggests asking for much more stuff, since every part they've thought of up to now has been included. Ah, sensible homeowner needs to milk this for all it's worth. Day 2. Well, Day 1.9999: Doug, in additional informal duds as properly, will get to lug the still-perky and still-informally-dressed Paige into the half-completed room (at 2 AM) to verify the paint job. He sees spots on the ceiling. I believe he is just seeing spots, period. He sends Paige dwelling for her beauty sleep. Maybe he's seeing spots and thinks she's got acne or something. Barbie says that Paige does not need beauty sleep. Doug kisses Paige on the cheek. Paige says, dreamily - because she's about to fall asleep - "I really feel extra stunning already!" and leaves. First Amy Wynn, now Paige. My God, I'm getting jealous of Doug. Someone shoot me. Over at Casa Del Maple Floor, one of the pleasant hardworking Home Depot folks (who work all night time on things for everybody, I'm sure) semi-jokingly decides to take a five hour espresso break. His head's most likely on a pike at Home Depot's company HQ proper now. Paige, feeling considerably ineffective with the pile of trained professionals around, lastly goes residence. Her meandering speech makes me think the left side of her mind (or her scriptwriter) has already gone to sleep. Whatever she's taking, I need some. Paige, inhumanly perky as ever, reveals up after 3 hours of sleep to start Day 2 proper. Laurie, upon seeing the floors, sits down on them and begins.... What? Oh, no, don't do the splits. Don't do them, do not do them don'tdothem don'tdothemdon'tdothem ARRRRRRRGH! Well, not fairly the splits, however no matter it was, it was neither ladylike nor inside my range of comfort. Fortunately, the marble fireplace is not massive sufficient for her to sprawl on. Doug finds his charges looking at some electronics and the instruction manuals of mentioned electronics. John claims there isn't any English directions, solely French. You understand he just burned the English ones so he would not get caught having to read them and put the stuff together. Jester romances: Now that Doug's army has apparently left and is wantonly redecorating the countryside, I'd wish to entertain you with a bit of purple prose. She, with gentle and adoring contact, caressed her one true love. She recited her love's virtues intimately, for all to hear. She took this symbol of perfection into her arms and proclaimed with a breathy voice that "This, that is drapery." Yep, Laurie's drapes have arrived. And that i defy anyone to jot down a more correct description of Laurie's behavior in this scene. Oh, by the best way, this scene also introduces Greg, the second of Laurie's fabric wranglers - in comparison with Doug's, say, none - one she in all probability had in an outsourced dungeon. As her latest (and solely second, not counting the ground labor) indentured slave hangs the drapes, Laurie lays some carpet, custom cut by a agency in her adopted home town. It seems faintly like a large Tetris piece. Doug's timing is method off. Maybe he wants a brand new belt. Doug is actually searching for Barbie and John's okay for something. Seems that he does not like the tile on the fireplace and would like to place some marble up. Considering that he inpergonated the tile ground against the homeowner's earlier needs, I do not assume he ought to start seeking permissions at this late stage. Nice legs. Amy Wynn's working on the table legs. Paige has turned traitor and is saying staining the table won't be so unhealthy. Perhaps General Doug threatened to have her shot... ... and possibly with the nail gun he is utilizing to nail the wainscoting onto the wall. We love Greg. We want to present Greg a medal. As Laurie's giving one in all her trademark Speeches About Things She Doesn't Know Much About, she says "The pleat up prime - he did the pinched pleat as a result of...." Greg interrupts her. "Gathered." Laurie responds with a sideways glance and a terse "Thank you." earlier than persevering with her lecture on how the drapes have gathered pleats to make them contemporary and informal. She ends with, "So these are real relaxed" - instantly she hastens her speech - "Italian-silk-drapery-that-value-six-thousand-dollars!" She additionally twitches like she's fighting a desire to do the Funky Chicken. Simply because he does not remember it doesn't suggest he won't miss it! Doug, Paige, and Barbie sit on the floor and start unwrapping the various kitcheny accouterments Doug purchased. So many he is lost track of what he bought. Paige, maybe still just a little mentally fried after only three hours of sleep, begins playing with some contraption that appears like picket spoons tied collectively at their center. Not garnering sufficient consideration with this, she grabs a bowl and inverts it, not noticing that there was something inside. The online effect of this is that she dumps one tissue-coated and probably-fragile object onto one other possibly-fragile object. Doug has the horror-followed-by-a-brief-tempered-scolding response you'd expect of someone in his sneakers. Then Barbie pipes up and says, in a tone I haven't heard since my final encounter with an elementary faculty tattle-tale, "She's just attempting to get you over funds. She's gonna break it!" Ladies and gentlemen, we've the hat trick. First Amy Wynn with the noticed, then Doug with the sewing machine, now Paige with the equipment. She has put in a solid attempt at ticking all three of them off. As it was, the dropped object was just wooden bowls and nothing else seemed damaged. Only a bit more fabric... Laurie's acquired Tina and James working on reupholstering kitchen-kind chairs. She tries to freak Tina by appearing like Tina staple-gunned her finger. Wait 'til you get back to your home and see the drapes. You'll have an embolism! Doug reveals the distinction between a $1,500 excessive-finish lamp that he bought from somebody in the identical building as his art studio and a $65 thrift-store buy. Not a lot, the way he is talking. I guess he would not want to buy from that particular person once more.... Barbie gasps on the $1,500 worth tag. Paige and Barbie want the expensive one. Just on the color, I have to agree. Though $1,435 looks like an enormous markup only for the difference between icky mustard yellow and sky blue. Oh, and remember the expensive one's teardrop higher half, in comparison with the other one's cylindrical upper half. And the jangly issues. Doug has kept no less than one of his legion for the second day: The artisan named Ron who's painting some plasterish fashionable-art thingy on the wall. Flee from the market: Laurie shows off her mass of equipment. Tina says it appears like a flea market. Laurie says it is far more expensive than a flea market. Yeah, however it still seems to be like a flea market. Laurie: A $100 tchotchke remains to be a tchotchke. As if in response to this, she whips out a 19th century sunburst Italian mirror. Tina asks how old it is. Laurie as a substitute tells Tina when she thinks it was made. "It's in all probability late, late 1800s. Like 1890, probably turn-of-the-century." Excuse me, but when it was turn-of-the-century wouldn't or not it's a twentieth century sunburst Italian mirror? James, as he's executed all episode, notably with the chairs, permits Laurie her huge moment: He asks the value. About $1800. Man, she likes that number. Dates, costs, if it is not within the 1800 range it is not value it. The inclusion of fabric, in fact, requires an incidental 500% markup. You've by no means asked for one before, why begin now? Doug decides, as soon as the countertop is in, to take the unprecedented move of asking somebody (particularly, Barbie) for an opinion. She would not like it. Surprise! Though, for once, I agree with Barbie utterly. A sample (marble, granite, and so forth.) would look higher than solid white. Doug, performing one other marvel in a day already stuffed with wonders, explains his reasoning: "In order for me to put a quality countertop in right here and not go together with a laminate, the one thing obtainable is Corian Glacier White." So, was this a value concern, an inventory problem, what? "Give it an opportunity, as a result of what's going to occur is, by the belongings you put on the countertops and accessorizing it, and we throw in pops of coloration, it is all gonna work. And, and, it is gonna... we'll put some life into this place, okay? I believe in the end you're gonna prefer it." I translated that as saying "It is likely to be a pig, however we have not put the lipstick on it yet." Whatever you placed on it, it is nonetheless gonna be a stark white countertop. You can't bury it all! Geometry for rank novices: Ty moves bits of the cocktail desk round semi-purposelessly as Laurie looks on. Ty appears to be going for a cube. No spanking, so we'll pop some bubble paper. Paige, cruelly snuffing out bubble paper bubbles, declares that the time has come for Tina and James to start the elusive Paige Gift hunt. Tina and James want to get a whole house leisure library. Paige seems unimpressed. Tina wins the onscreen coin toss and can be off on the hunt. Damn, no cheap intercourse jokes this time. Happiness is a warm gun. Give one to Doug. No, wait, give it to ME! The place that Amy Wynn took her magnum opus, the mahogany desk, to be sanded, took over 3/eight of an inch - virtually A HALF AN INCH - off the table, so now the nails that she punched into the underside of the desk are displaying by way of the highest. Doug needs names and addresses of the perpetrators. Not less than, until Amy Wynn factors out that she needs to tap in all of the nails, leaving an ugly pattern. After that, Doug simply says they won't see it after he stains it. Yeah, besides there's nonetheless a bunch of nails sticking out the bottom of the table! I would like Doug's name and tackle, then. Oh, wait, I've his name. Also, because abusing the mahogany with stain wasn't unhealthy sufficient, he has to rush-job it and stain the maple along with the mahogany, one thing Amy Wynn can't guess at the end result of. Doug admits that he doesn't know either. Amy Wynn appears to be like about as ticked off as I can be if I spent two days on one thing and had somebody come along and wish to screw around with it in methods even HE does not understand. What number of butchers did it's important to kill for that, then? Members of Doug's military are rubbing butcher's wax on the partitions for reasons I fail to know. Speed up! Speed up! Make pizza out of the cameraman! The limo from the buying trip yesterday artfully stops in entrance of a cameraman who's busy catching Tina's first glimpse of the limo. Yo, yo, yo! Ty 'State' Pennington is in tha hizzy! Word! The pre-commercial bumper is Ty, confirming my suspicions, in full purple and leopard-print gear, including the bling-bling ring and phat necklace from yesterday. He looks like an extra from Pimps at Sea. Speaking of whoring.... Sony Vega advert number three, not counting in-present product placement. Rewind time: What? An ad for the hundred grand present? I'm WATCHING IT! Oh, it is the encore. I idly observe that they had a black limo in the advert, and a white one in-show. I'm additionally reminded of what a total goddess Amy Wynn is when she's not dressed in butch carpenter gear. Now, we have to see about not dressed, interval. Awwwww. Tina gets all choked up concerning the wonder of all that is happened. Gun! I want the freaking gun! Doug, with Barbie at his facet as a result of Amy Wynn's probably in the fetal position someplace, shouldn't be proud of the "professional" sanding on the table. The staining has made obvious what appears like abrasion lines from the sanding. But, unlike Doug, I'm additionally unhappy with the staining: It looks like somebody took a flamethrower to the desk. (Meanwhile, Ty's masterworks, the great-looking shelves and fireplace mantle, are being installed.) Doug decides to get the stain off the maple, then tape the maple up LIKE HE Should HAVE Done IN The primary PLACE, restain any unstained mahogany, then oil-rub the whole desk. Doug: I hope Birnam Wood marches to your house and kicks your ass! Ewwwww. Tina units Paige up for disaster by utilizing this logic: $A thousand divided by $20/CD or DVD = 500 objects. First off, nobody in the identical universe because the RIAA pays that little for a CD newer than 1995 vintage. DVD's ain't low cost either. Second, taxes. Finally, $1000/$20 = 50. Looks like Paige is gonna be the one being told she's gone overbudget for a change. As they stand on the checkout, Paige (the sunshine going on) imparts this last little bit of wisdom on Tina. Paige has a future profession in government finances balancing. Tina asks the cashier if they will start over. The cashier says sure. The cashier is being paid to say sure. Tina says, cryptically, "Only favorites!" So that you have been going to purchase films that your neighbors hated...? Hey, it pays higher than 'housewife': Because the shelves go up and Laurie plans the tchotchke invasion, she asks Ty how they'll ever go back to their real jobs. She hastily adds "of Trading Spaces". Ty says "Oh! I assumed you meant upkeep." This could be a pleasant means of firing someone. "It is the smartest thing you've got ever performed. Oh, by the way, decide up two weeks' pay and clear out your locker. Security will escort you out." Woah. Doppelganger moment. Paige speaks to the limo driver briefly, giving him a number of seconds on camera to brag to the household with. (Looks.) Woah, man, he appears to be like like an older version of this man I worked with last yr! Same hair and every part! HEY BUDDY! You understand A man NAMED J.C. McLEAN? MarkNathanorJohn MarkNathanorJohn, who's actually Mark, helps put the fridge in. Despite homeowner John doing all the pushing, Doug ignores him to appease the company Gods and proclaim that "The new black is orange!" (Orange as in the house Depot shirt shade.) The corporate Gods have to have this one explained to them, for they assume it's some type of African-American reference. Run Laurie over! Run a production assistant over! For God's sake, RUN Someone OVER! Paige and Tina get back, nonetheless riding in the limo, as Laurie and James look on. Whereas Laurie's usually wailing while Paige talks of funds overruns, now that the shoe's on the opposite foot... ... Laurie's nonetheless wailing (about time constraints) and Paige remains to be talking about budget overruns. Some things by no means change. Maybe we could get collectively on weekends and you could possibly take orders...? Guys? Guys? General Doug's army finally disbands. Doug makes some cryptic comments about the marble for the fireplace. It's common as a result of it's bigger than the universe. Laurie and Paige put an enormous painting on the mantle. "It's sort of a common painting, 'trigger it is a panorama, however but it is received an abstract(?) quality...." I think it overwhelms the fireplace. Paige uses the phrase "Kick it up a notch." Emeril's gonna kick your ass, Paige. BAM! General Doug and his last two troopers are holed up in a tent in Plymouth.... Doug says it is playtime! Whee! Time to maneuver the furnishings in! What? Doug's got one kinky thought of fun. Holy Hell, she mentioned "Heck"! Laurie discusses lacking marble (Oy vey.) and says she knows she did not put it in her automobile because it's "heavy as heck". This deserves its own merchandise. Well, no, however I considered this subsequent headline and could not pass it up: You misplaced them a long time ago, honey. Oh, it is singular. Never thoughts. After some fairly muted agonizing (for Laurie) about her misplaced marble, Ty comes alongside and reads his strains admirably, 'by chance' implicating Doug in naughtiness. Paige asks if Laurie's being arrange. Laurie says no. Obviously not, since we have tripped previous the land of in all probability-scripted into oh-boy-is-this-faux. Laurie goes on the hunt for Doug. Doug is outside hiding a tile cutter and tossing marble away from said cutter. Laurie sneaks up behind him - he ought to borrow a few of Ty's magic early warning system mojo - and confronts him. Essentially the most memorable part being when Laurie says "You'll be able to run, darling, but you can't disguise!" That's not memorable, what's memorable is that Doug is bobbing up and down (hiding tile) and yet she appears to keep her eyes locked on the place Doug's head would be if he weren't bobbing. Is the cue card man over there or something? The Realm of The Archon vs. The Land of Laurie: The bloody battle for supremacy continues. James, unable to play sounding board for Laurie's value-tallying methods, broadcasts that the lamp shades Laurie bought are ninety bucks a pop. Tina says "Well, James, we're dwelling within the Land of Laurie and that is chump change." Best quote all episode. Laurie slips Doug the tongue: That'll keep you studying. Well, really, she grabs his face, sticks out her tongue, and makes a raspberry noise. Apt punishment for stealing marble tile, to be sure. But given the quantity of saliva that can throw, I believe it is shut sufficient to depend as an intimate gesture. Paige, of course, comes along and deflates Laurie's balloon by mentioning the electrician factor. Laurie and Paige run away laughing. Doug is left alone, confused and offended. When will the hurting cease, Paige? But that scene was great leisure. Compared to the Ty/Amy Wynn battle, anyway. Watching Doug nonchalantly toss marble round was a deep and profound experience of top quality that the individuals of the world needs to be forced to see for their own profit. Quickies: Memorable moments from the ultimate meeting montage: 1) Ty and James hook up the Tv, DVD, etc. Except they don't use any cables. They never use any cables on exhibits like these. 2) Laurie placing the Italian drapes, mirror, and chair all in one handy place for unity. That, and so Marmaduke can damage them all with one badly-aimed leap. Munchies! Ty, ever the gent- oh, used that line before. Ty makes to bust open a bag of chips all over Laurie's springfall-fresh room, all whereas scuffing the coffee desk with his sneakers. Doug, on the other hand, lastly hangs the large lampshade he purchased at the highest of the episode. Paige declares that time's up while roaming around alone at midnight with a flashlight. I guess Laurie got her again for that golf cart incident. And if not, I need to discover a solution to blame Laurie anyway. The before and afters make one factor apparent: The rooms swapped colours. The kitchen that used to be heavy on yellows and other vibrant colors is now blue-grey. The blue-grey living room is now yellow. Chestertown Buff, sorry. Repeated jokes and previous puns: Ah, the pre-business bumper the place Doug's got Laurie slung over his shoulder. If you're expecting some joke about Doug having Laurie throughout him, then you are going to be disappointed. Not as a result of I'm above that, I just could not assume of one to trump the tongue joke. But is Laurie sporting something beneath her shirt or is that her unnaturally pale back I'm seeing the place her shirt rides up? Chit-chat time: I'll inform you, after two hours of Laurie in that one outfit, the crimson sleeveless number she has on for the chat is a welcome change. Man, and I believed I used to be pale. Incidentally, Ty's cocktail table is neat. A bit busy for the room, however neat. Oh, and the worth of the fabric for the curtains? $120 per yard. I knew she'd beat Doug. Only strategy to trump silk is to grab an imported bolt of Italian fabric. Final finances: $49,300. That lost $seven-hundred pains Ms. Smith greatly. My opinion on the room? Laurie commonplace, solely more fabric-obnoxious. Cluttered. Pieces are, for the most part, good individually, however the room cannot handle 'em all. The flowers that vanish proper at the top of the stop-motion room redo is a pleasant touch, too. Reveal? Big deal: Did Barbie look not-terribly-amazed when she first opened her eyes? What part of the room was she taking a look at? John notices the Tv. He's trying to redeem himself, good boy. Paige takes the opening to clarify that Sony donated the Tv and associated rigging - it wasn't a part of the funds. Sure as hell hope they donated the wires too. Overall reaction: Amazed. Laurie and Ty hid in the kitchen and watched the reveal. Their opinion? Laurie thinks they liked it. Ty's more pragmatic: "Who wouldn't?" I believe he means the cash quantity spent, not the design itself. But the assertion's ambiguous sufficient that I give him factors for rare diplomacy. Oh, damn, I am unable to hate him now. Ty's comments to Laurie at the top, during her hand-clasping "I'd do this room over and over again; I would not change a factor." gesturama, have been fantastic. He asks, "You would not minimize down on a few of the knickknacks?" That and his sarcastic comment on how the room wanted "another piece of furnishings" redeemed him. He's back in my good graces, but when it was between him and Amy Wynn, I'd still assist her chopping his head off. Hate transference: However.... Judging by her "it will not fit" response to the "yet another piece of furniture" comment, Laurie didn't notice Ty was being sarcastic. His easy "Oh, I do know that." was amazingly diplomatic, more so than my "He's being sarcastic, you brainless mass of Italian-fabric-draped ego!" or one thing to that impact. Let's see what he is cookin' up tonight. Today. Good. The kitchen's nice, aside from the countertop. Say what you'll, the white cupboards plus the white countertop and the halogen lights is just an excessive amount of. Something needs to be gray, or something a little less vivid and stark. Even white with some sample. I just realized that they moved the stove. Man, that is gonna be a hard room for the homeowners to cook in for some time. Oh, and can the silk drapes survive that close to the cooking space? And while with regards to drapes, I'd like to put in a vote in opposition to drapes that drag on the ground like this. You can not make a drape that drags look good! The table still has shades of flamethrower abuse, although some magic has converted it from godawful to tolerable. Four chairs, no sofa. None of them pointing on the Tv, which is excessive over the fireplace and also you'd must crane your neck to observe it. Or lie down, which you cannot, as a result of there is not any couch! Smooth move, Doug. Just needed to get a kind of "aesthetic" unusability tips in there. Paige nails it when she says the flatscreen "Looks like artwork up there!" Translation: You did not need to get artwork, and also you did not know the place to place the Tv, so you killed two birds with one stone. Final budget: $50,000 less $28. That's impressive. It could be far more spectacular if he'd bought a painting for the fireplace and stuck the Tv someplace else. Like where that "artisan" pal of Doug's was working. Two days and all he did artwork-smart was three rectangles of paint? What the hell am I missing here? The dwelling room of the kitchen/residing/dining room combo is a bit cramped, which makes me assume that Doug does two-and-a-half rooms for Laurie's one. Reveal? Bigger deal: They just like the room. Rather a lot, it appears. Tina notices the kitchen's change in floor plan straight away. Paige would not appear to (or wish to) pick up on it and just retains talking about the brand new stuff. Doug and Amy Wynn just like the warm glow of large amounts of money and Real Wood. Final verdict: I'm not fond of both one, however mostly for usability points. Though I wasn't fond of them earlier than, they no less than appeared like you would not come out of them with neck cramps. We'll say okay job because of the low incidence of fatal screwups. Well.... I do hope you loved these ten thousand plus words, however in case you didn't, at the least take consolation in my surprise at your studying the whole thing. Goodnight! Beat a hasty retreat to the main web page.

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Trading Spaces is owned by these Banyan individuals, or something. TLC's got something to do with it, too. I don't own these. If I did, I'd in all probability hearth Laurie. Or have Doug in entrance of a firing squad.